I have a great fear of rejection
My great fear of rejection has made me a very insecure person. Someone who constantly worries about what others may think.
This fear has been nothing more than the result of their experiences. Most of them, very negative.
Toxic relationships, manipulation, emotional deprivation … All this has caused fear to have people angry with you.
But you know what? This fear can use it to your advantage. What’s more, you can get rid of it and take it as an opportunity to learn.
Fear of rejection prevents you to be assertive
That fear that others will reject you has become a fearful person who is unable to refuse to do what they do not want.
Imagine that a friend of yours asks you to do something that goes against your values. If you suffer from this fear, it will be very difficult to express what I really want to say. A resounding “no”.
It is true that the inability to be assertive lies not only in fear rejection. However, it is true that power.
From small we are taught that we should give ourselves to others, being kind and always “yes” say. This is socially well seen.
But what happens if we do not want or simply do not want us? We feel wrong to deny us and we “get used” bad. We are carving out a path to a fear you cannot have back.
It is normal that the rejection affects you
You might think that the refusal should not affect you; however, this would not be human. No one is prepared to be disowned by others.
The question is in how sensitive you are to it. It is you who decides if paralyzes you and increases your insecurity or, instead, if it makes you stronger and increases your self-confidence.
Sometimes this fear causes we get to see situations that really are not producing. For example, have you ever been around a group of people who snickered? What did you feel?
A very insecure person may think you are making fun of her. Someone who is not, think what situation you will have seen them doing so funny.
On more than one occasion, the fear of rejection will cause us to doubt everything and everyone.
You may also like to read another article on AnxietyReduction: Is Stress Shortening Your Life Span?
Do you accept how are you?
Unconditionally accept us as we are it may seem simple, but it is not.
It requires a lot of self-confidence, a high safety. This allows you to avoid those situations where you think someone may be laughing or talking bad about you.
To do this you have to follow some guidelines that you should take as a reference:
- Do not compare yourself with others.
- Accept your strengths and also those that make you weak.
- Trust your abilities.
- Do not try to hide what makes you unique.
- Disregard the critical destructive.
If you are able to carry all this out, you’ll be a step to get the absolute acceptance. That is, you will not care what anyone else says and not be afraid to say what you really think.
Not up to you
At this point, it is important to note that the fact that you refuse not up to you. Moreover, to avoid this condition lies.
When you say “yes” instead of “no”, you are not telling the truth. In our daily relationships, it seems easy to do, but what happens in other areas?
They can refuse you in a job interview, your project may not be valid, the effort that your company has spent 4 months you may be going to hell because another company does not convince you …
They are multiple situations in which we will face this rejection. The big question is: Will you let it affect you?
Fear of rejection has to be a learning experience that allows you to gain security. Do not let them block and make you feel that you are not fit to do what you want.
Things are not always going to work out. We cannot always please everyone.
What do you expect to be yourself?